When one door closes I tend to hear it shut. Like a click or other audibly sound coming from it. Sometimes, I can feel it in my ears cause it was slammed shut so hard that the air pressure had changed. But when God closes the door sometimes it just shocks me. Why? Because I left the door open for a reason. To be able to walk out. The door had closed on me again. It had happen twice under 10 days of each other.
When the first door closed on me. I was getting use to my session. I was (and still am) growing and stretching. It ended in my eyes to early. But the Lord knows that I need be challenged in different ways and I can’t keep the status quo.
I am learning that I have to lean on him more. I have to check in more frequently with my heavenly father and let him guide me more every day. (This is huge. To submit and give up things on the cross sometimes can be difficult. Truly I didn’t know that this would take a lot of time to give him my all.) Please pray for me as I do need give up negative self talk, things of the past, and trust him on a daily. I do have things that I am thankful for. Each day I try to shout out his glorious things he has given me.
When the second door closed I was upset. But it reminded me how much I was still hanging on to hurt feelings from the first door closing. I had made some good friends and prayer partners in my Twin Cities Bridegroom Fast group. I have people who stretched me and shown me that I have not given grace or love them as I should. Not because I don’t love them at all. Because after all they are part of God children. But because I have had to over come some stuff on my own. And I didn’t like the way I acted. I need to show Love and Grace to this person. I am so thankful that I needed this group to show me that.
I am standing at the patio door looking at all the wonderful things and it is going to be an amazing trip. I know that I am not where I think that I should be. But my heavenly father surely knows that I am suppose to be right where I am at.
If you have any prayer request let me know. I will pray for you to. As we are on this journey together.